So I haven’t been good about updating this, but so it goes. At any rate, here is an expression not to be forgotten:
恩着せがましい (おんきせがましい) = Unfortunately no neat, one-word definition exists for this term (though some dictionaries list “patronizing”). It is used to describe someone (critically) who says things in a way that lets you know he is expecting you to know that he is doing you a favor.
So the next time your mother goes on about the troubles she endure to bear and raise you, you can respond with おんきせがましい！With the added benefit of her not knowing what you said.